Wednesday 1 February 2017

Understanding Love Relationships



Love is an emotion of enormous power. All long-term relationships go through a variety of phases.  If the relationship continues, it settles into a more stable time of building a history as a couple. If children or teenagers enter into the picture, that is entirely a new phase. Later, there is another phase of being together as a mature couple with the wisdom of experience.

People say Love and relationships in present age do not have that passion like old days. But were the relationships in old times really perfect? The truth is there was a perception set in everyone’s mind that relationships should last forever, at least once we're married to someone, the societal obscurity that we have to be with that person, no matter whether we are happy or not, but just because we have circumscribed with the vows of marriage. Although we are not too different from those people who lived centuries ago, our core desires are still the same. But we have become practical in our lives.Imagine being in love, maybe you have been in love or you hope to be in love. We figure out things quickly, we make quick decisions, a number of emotions rush together so quickly, but then what happens? 50% of marriages get failed? Why? Have you ever tried to discover the answer? 


Sometimes, two people come out to be completely different, maybe the female could be goal oriented but fallen in love with the guy who wants his girl or wife to not to work, or go for some other job or any other similar thought. The moment when love rules our mind, we don’t let our brain function, and we just flow with the storm of emotions. We agree to such mundane things, the kind of behavior we don't expect from ourselves. We get ready to sacrifice, sacrifice our ambitions, our dreams, our actual self, but the truth is one can never change his true personality, and hence it results in divorce, break-ups, and range of relationship problems.


We have the prefrontal cortex brain which takes rational decisions, located near the front head, is involved in decision making in response to emotions. The prefrontal cortex controls what decision a person makes when faced with an emotional reaction. The same part of the brain controls addictions and the feeling of love. But what happens our feeling of being in love gets too strong which starts controlling even our brain and mind, and we become unable to take rational decisions in love matters and accept even the wrong. And this is what happens when we realize, that the person in front of us is not the right, and we should stop here or should contemplate the situation, but suddenly the other part of the brain which is controlled by the feeling of love suddenly comes and tell the brain to knock it off, we don’t let the prefrontal cortex brain control our heart -- let alone the feeling of love.


The most important thing one needs to understand is, never fall in love, and always rise in love. Let the person accept you as you are. Love is supporting each other, fight for each other’s dreams to make them true. Remember, attachments are always against love. As long as you are attached to someone or have a fear of losing someone, you can never reach to the unconditional boundaries of love. The key to a properly functioning love and a lasting relationship is trust. It does not require rituals to follow or get circumscribed with vows of marriage or rituals which bounds you to be with the person and not to exit the doors even when two are not happy together. 


Love is about two people committing themselves to the fullest.  Often people are so lost in their search for the custom or traditional love they believe in, that they forget commitment and love are truly important to make things work. The dream of the perfection which exists in the mind of people keeps them away from the reality. One must understand the perfection comes with the true understanding of unconditional love. 


So now, do you understand love? 

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